Recently I’ve been inundated by a wave of new followers on Twitter—a collection of pathetic, lonely, fly fishing persons with too much free time on their hands. Apparently there are unwritten Twitter rules of etiquette that suggest when someone follows you, you’re expected to send these people a message thanking them for their allegiance.
Let’s get something straight: I do not thank people for following me.
If you follow the Hawg-Brown, it’s your choice. You should thank me.
Emotion is a weakness. Even if were capable of showing emotion, I would not.
So, follow me if you must—but do not expect a show of gratitude. No frilly little love letters laced with smiley faces, no participant ribbons. No, “looking forward to your tweets!” because I am not.
My name is Roderick Hawg-Brown, and I speak the truth